The place where God calls you to is the place where deep gladness and the worlds deep hunger meets.
-Frederick Beuchner
It’s about time for a blog! I haven’t written one since
outreach… God is just as good to me when I’m going all out on the literal
missions field as he is when I’m in a season of learning and rest. Plus it’s
just time for some updating!
It is currently a nice Sunday afternoon… I have enjoyed a
very nice morning of catching up on emails, pictures and updates as I listen to
wonderfully mellow music and enjoying numerous cups of tea. Oh and did I
mention is it raining? This afternoon is right up my alley.
A lot of people have been, and do ask throughout this DTS,
“What are your plans after this school?” It’s so fun to answer this question. The
Emilie one year ago may have immediately given a detailed dream and expectation
for her future- knowing exactly her talents, her desires and her potential and
using them to piece together a perfect little future of, yes, serving God, but
possibly being too preoccupied by her own big dreams and plans to fully submit.
But thanks to God, that’s not the Emilie I am today. That Emilie changed ONE
day, during ONE quiet time with the Lord, and waiting quietly upon him for ONE
minute. It was during that ONE
moment of my life that the Lord spoke something to me that would forever change
my life and the course of it;
“I’m calling you back to Africa”.
It was such a sudden clear voice like I’d never heard that
actually terrified me. “God, did you really just say that?!.... Oh goodness of
course you did… oh my….. oh. No.” Okay, I yes I was dreading and fearing a bit
(or a lot, whatever.)…. When God trusts you enough you ask you to lay down
something big, it’s because he wants to do something big…. and it’s time to
make room. I have been blessed to go through numerous experiences to find that
once he asks of you to surrender something, or to take a risk, he will not
relent until you do it. He loves us too much than to call us to a higher place
with Him and then to not stay right by our side, reminding us and encouraging
us constantly what we’re capable of and that we can do it. So yes, in this
moment I was full of fear… yet a steady peace reigned in me that He just
started a new chapter in my life that he would be right along side me the whole
way.
From that day up until I boarded the airplane to Africa, the
Lord was so good to confirm and to encourage me along the way that this was the
path I was to be walking on. And though I was sure and confident that going to
Africa was my purpose for this time and though I knew deep in my heart that I
was ready, I was truly dreading and fearing this trip. It was the last thing
Emilie Ely would EVER do and of COURSE that’s what God would call me to!
But things changed the moment I set foot on the African
ground; the inner Emilie who I was created to be and whom I had not yet known
was beginning to quickly and naturally to be discovered and revealed by the
Lord. I began to see, understand and become the heart I didn’t known I had; the
heart that God knew was ready for this adventure with Him even If I myself
didn’t feel ready one bit.
I like to explain this by giving a visual of two different
paths in life; one is aligned with a future of everything your heart desires;
your perfect little cookie-cutter planned out life of graduating your dream
school, marrying your dream soul mate, working your dream job and having a
perfect little dreamy family. But the other is a path of risk in which the only
way of entry is with God; you are blinded by what’s down this path, yet it’s
the path your Creator calls you to. It’s a path far too extravagant and glory
filled for your earthly eyes to see and your human mind to understand. Yet, He
calls you to trust Him, and to take to the plunge with Him. You’d find yourself
saying, “I want to take this path with God- my heart and soul is drawn to it,
but do I even know him well enough to trust Him with my life? Can I trust him
with my future and my everything? Does he really know me?”
Maybe I’m just a young girl. I’m 19 years young and 8 years
in a genuine relationship with Him. But I know the answer to these questions.
Yes. Trust Him with your life, you were made and designed to
live for Him.
Yes. Trust Him with your future; He’s the only one who knows
it and He designed it for you to know and walk in.
And yes; He knows you. He knows every little desire of your
heart, every fear and every intricate part of you. More than you know yourself.
I’m just 3 months in this journey- 3 months down this path
of the exciting unknown; And I have discovered secret realms and parts of the
Lord that are better than life. I have tapped into just a small portion of the
supernatural joy, fulfillment and peace that I am promised multiplied portions
of for all of my days and beyond. I have received such a small, small sliver
sized portion of this goodness compared to the eternity I have with Him and
will be receiving from him!
And this, what I just explained, is what goes through my
mind the moment a person asks “What are you doing after DTS?”. The answer is…
“I have no idea… and it is the most exciting thing EVER!!!” Why? Because the
Creator of the Universe not only knows me best, knows where I belong and knows
where I was made to be, but also because I am confident that He knows exactly
where and when I need to be; and He will tell me. I am not a slave to my future
and I do not fear it, because I’ve chosen to walk down a path in which I am
PRIVILAGED to let Him completely lead me. What freedom and peace there is in
NOT leading your own life! I have finally learned how to live in the present
and there is no greater peace.
Psalm 139
O Lord, you have searched me and known me!
2 You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
you discern my thoughts from afar.
3 You search out my path and my lying down
and are acquainted with all my ways.
4 Even before a word is on my tongue,
behold, O Lord, you know it altogether.
5 You hem me in, behind and before,
and lay your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
it is high; I cannot attain it.
2 You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
you discern my thoughts from afar.
3 You search out my path and my lying down
and are acquainted with all my ways.
4 Even before a word is on my tongue,
behold, O Lord, you know it altogether.
5 You hem me in, behind and before,
and lay your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
it is high; I cannot attain it.
13 For you formed my inward parts;
you knitted me together in my mother's womb.
14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
my soul knows it very well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
you knitted me together in my mother's womb.
14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
my soul knows it very well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 If I would count them, they are more than the sand.
I awake, and I am still with you.
How vast is the sum of them!
18 If I would count them, they are more than the sand.
I awake, and I am still with you.
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart!
Try me and know my thoughts!
24
and lead me in the way everlasting!
On other terms, we are preparing already for the main
outreach that will be taking place in 3 weeks! Tomorrow we will find out what
locations we will be going to, and from there the group will split into two for
the separate locations. It’s crazy how fast this school has gone; and it’s very
heartbreaking to think this will be my last 3 solid weeks with some people of
this school before we split for the last 6 weeks. Oh, YWAM relationships… not
looking forward to saying goodbye to loved ones, knowing that we’ll never see them
again. Depressing, I know but it’s the reality unfortunately!
Internet got set up last week and it’s SOO awesome to be
able to Skype everyone! Can I just say that Skype is a lifesaver? Whoever
invented it deserves some serious gold stars. Love it.
Anyways, that’s my small update for now and what has been
brewing in my heart. I’ll try to be more regular until outreach!
My prayer request to all my prayer warriors (aka all of you,
yes!!) out there is that the Lord would strengthen me to stay focused and determined
for these last two months. Also, that our group would be seekers of Jesus’ will
and heart, not our own or each other’s. Please pray that we’d all make an
effort to be in perfect unity through Christ.
Thank you, thank you, thank you for your love and support!
Em
"You Know Me" By Steffany Frizzell... this song was on my mind the whole time I was writing this. Beautiful!
Currently listening this THIS Jon Thurlow AMAZINGNESS. Thanks Val! Every song on this album is divine.